A new job listing…
Wanted: Candidates to fill an important judicial position in Washington D.C. starting this fall.
Length of appointment: Candidate selected will be appointed to this position for life (or until such time as they see fit to retire)
Requirements:
Candidates must be able to distinguish between the law as written and their own personal feelings
Candidates must understand that foreign law is inadmissible in Supreme Court deliberations
Candidates must demonstrate an understanding of the phrase “Legislating from the bench” and be able to effectively show how doing so is contrary to the very fabric of a Representative Democracy.
Candidates must have read the entire U.S. Constitution at least once (and be intimately familiar with Article III of the same).
Candidate must be able to demonstrate a record of healthy respect for the limits and dicatates of the U.S. Constitution and ALL of it’s ammendments in previous positions of employment.
Well qualified candidates will be able to summarize either (orally or in writing) the duties and responsibilities of the U.S. Supreme Court in relation to the other two branches of government. Must have a spine and an excellent grasp of history, including U.S. founding documents and their contemporaries in literature that describe the thoughts of the founders on the limits of government, especially where the judicial branch is concerned.
Candidates will be expected to appear before congress prior to their appointment, where they may be subjected to endless grandstanding and will undoubtedly be used by politicians of both parties to further their own political agendas (to include scoring cheap brownie points at your expense). Candidates may be defamed, smeared or humiliated as part of this appearance.
Other duties include: Avoiding the US Press at all costs, living in relative seclusion, and sitting through each State of the Union Speech without showing any emotion whatsoever.
Long Black Robes will be provided as part of the candidate’s compensation package.
Originalist, Libertarian and/or Conservative Jurisprudence is a definate plus.
If you fit the above requirements, please forward your resume to the White House, care of Rahm Emmanuel.
However, if you fit the above description, don’t hold your breath…
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